1. When caregiving toddler and infant grandsons, expeditiously remove dirty diapers. Most should bypass the kitchen garbage can and go directly to a dumpster or landfill. 
2. Learn how to drive a stick shift, administer CPR, use TurboTax, and cook a good omelet.
3. Get/Be good at something. Whether its plumbing, PowerPoint, playing the violin, or Wii bowling, be the expert people go to for something. Then keep getting better at it and find new ways to apply that knowledge and expertise.
4. God created everything. The evidence is overwhelming. Magnificent designs (e.g., the universe, the digestive system, an eyeball, etc.) require a Magnificent Designer.
5. The Bible is God’s word… inspired and authoritative. Basic-Instructions-Before-Leaving-Earth. It should be read, studied, and lived. I can’t pick and choose the parts I want to follow. There’s a huge difference in just believing in God and actually doing what He says.
6. God loved us enough to send His only Son to this earth to die for our sins. Let that sink in a little more every day.
7. Christ rose again and reigns in heaven. He’s coming back one day to take Christians home. Instructions on becoming a Christian… joining His team… are clearly laid out in the Bible. If you need help with this, please call or message me. 
8. The more you realize how much God loves you, the more you’ll want to follow the Bible. You won’t do that perfectly (not even close), but you’ll want to try to do your best… because God gave His best.
9. If you miss out on the above 5 things, you’ve missed out on everything. Nothing is more important in life. Eventually, every knee will bow and every tongue will confess that Jesus Christ is Lord. Figure that out while you’re still alive, and preferably while you’re young.
10. Choose the right spouse. Someone who has already figured out #4-8. You’ll be spending a lot of time with this person. Make sure she is someone who will help you get to heaven and do the same for her. If she is cute, funny, a good cook, and has an adorable southern accent, that’s a bonus.
11. Stay married. Be in it for the long haul. As much as it depends on you… one life, one wife.
12. Have at least one person in your life who will give you honest criticism and tell it like it is.
13. Live simply. For example, buy/rent only the amount of home you need. Maintaining/heating/cooling unused rooms in a “trophy” house is silly. 
14. Try to make a living doing something where the following 3 “circles” intersect: what you’re good at, what you’re passionate about, and where there’s a societal need.
15. Make people feel important. That starts by realizing that all people are loved and important. Thank the custodial staff at your school/place of business. Take your preacher to lunch. Send a church elder a thank you note.
16. Be a person of unquestionable integrity. If there’s a rumor that you lied or cheated, the people who know you best should be near 100% certain it’s not true.
17. If called to lead, don’t be timid.  Lead like a lion.  The pride will be comforted, encouraged, and inspired by that.
18. Have a vision for the future—for yourself, your family, your business, your church, etc. Sell your vision every day.
19. Be cheerful, upbeat, and optimistic. It’s okay to be joyful. In fact, we’re supposed to be.
20. Take initiative. Don’t stand around waiting for others to act. Be the change agent.
21. Invest in your kids and grandkids… family time, youth group activities, etc. You won’t get those years back. Teach your kids to know and love God. Make sure they (and you) are in Bible class every week. That’s more important than their grades, travel sports teams, scouts, etc.
22. Appreciate the little things–the Moe’s workers who welcome you when you come in, the parking spot that opens up near the mall, midgets, etc.
23. It’s okay to support a certain political party/candidate (especially pro-life ones!). But as Christians, keep in mind that our citizenship is in heaven and our leader is Christ. What goes on in your house is far more important than what goes on in the White House.
24. Concentrate on fixing things. Enough people are already focused on pointing out problems.
25. People who don’t smoke, drink, or gamble are generally going to end up better off than those who do. Rarely on a deathbed will someone say, “I wish I had smoked/drank/gambled more.”
26. Give blood regularly.  When they ask where in Honduras you visited, it’s best just to say, “near Tegucigalpa”.
27. Take care of yourself. Eat nutritious foods in moderation. Drink lots of water. Work out at least 3 times/week. Get plenty of sleep. You are best able to serve others when you are healthy yourself.
28. Figure out what pleases your spouse.  A rigorous foot massage and doing the laundry may be appreciated more than flowers.
29. Take chances, recognizing you won’t always succeed. The most successful people have failed a bunch. You’re more likely to regret the things you didn’t try than the things you tried and failed at.
30. All things being equal, choose a dog over a cat.
31. Read Crazy Love by Francis Chan and Love Does by Bob Goff. Then re-read them with a pen and a highlighter.
32. Find a way to take your kids on a mission trip to a third-world country before they graduate. It will change their lives and yours. I’ve heard many young people say that it was on a mission trip where their faith started to become real to them… not just something they inherited from their parents.
33. Don’t get too cocky about your winning pro/college sports team. You had little to do with it. Fantasy teams that you selected?  Well, that’s a different story.
34. Dream big dreams. If there’s a compelling enough “why” behind them, you’ll figure out the “how”. Don’t get to the end of your life never having gone on a crazy adventure.
35. You can learn a lot about life from your children. If you’ve done your job, you might even start looking at them as role models.
36. Tell your family you love them. Then tell them that over and over again. You never know when it will be the last time you speak to them. Could be tonight. So, tell them that now… then come back to this list.
37. Double-check your hose before opening the valve on your RV’s black tank.  
38. Stick with low-cost term life insurance and diversified no load mutual funds. Don’t mix insurance and investments.
39. Never give up. Never, ever give up. Others will give up. You stick it out.
40. Get a will (or trust), Power of Attorney, Medical Power of Attorney, Living Will, and Declaration of Guardian (if you have kids).  Make sure your parents have done the same, and that you know where these documents are located.
41. Work hard… but also take time to re-charge, take vacations, etc. Sharpen the saw.
42. Don’t tell a joke during a vasectomy–even one you know you can land. It’s more important for your doctor to have steady hands than laugh. More on that in Vol. 2 of my memoir.
43. Choose your friends carefully and cultivate those friendships. You tend to become like the people you hang with.
44. Apologize when you mess up. And sometimes even when you don’t.
45. The sooner you realize you’ll never be the perfect spouse / parent / child / employee / church leader / friend / etc., the better off you’ll be. Focus on becoming the best version of yourself.  
46. Open a Roth IRA by age 22 and begin contributing the max amount to it by automatic payroll deduction. When you hit 72, thank me.
47. Champion a cause larger than yourself. Open an orphanage. Plant a church. Adopt a child or donate to help someone else trying to adopt. Teach/mentor someone. Don’t have too much of your life be just about you. If you need inspiration, spend an hour chatting with a Dalton Hines, Chase Turner, or Todd Tipton.
48. Be patriotic. Pick up a meal for a young service member and his/her family. Stand up straight and put your hand over your heart during the playing of the National Anthem. For all of our country’s problems, it’s still our country… and millions of people around the world would give anything to live here.
49. Don’t be dull and boring at what you do. Be creative. Break out from the herd. Have a compelling story.
50. Don’t leave attending to the sick, feeding the hungry, helping the elderly, visiting prisoners, making disciples, etc., to the elders/deacons/paid church staff. We should all be involved in ministry.
51. The two most important skills, at least from my military career: 1) the ability to get along with and relate to other people; and 2) the ability to communicate (talking, writing, briefing) to sell your ideas.  Master these two skills.
52. Keep dental floss in your car’s driver’s side storage compartment. You’re more likely to use it at red lights than at home. That said, flossing semi-annually prior to your dental exam is technically “regularly”, should the hygienist want to go there.
53. Focus on your circle of influence (feeding a homeless person) rather than your circle of concern (world hunger).
54. Nowhere does the Bible tell us to be “tolerant” of sin. We should avoid doing things that are wrong and, in a loving way, teach/encourage others who are caught up in sinful lifestyles. Hate (be intolerant of) the sin… but always love and be kind to the sinner (including yourself). Pretty sure that’s what God does.
55. Purge regularly—closets, drawers, storage rooms, glove compartments, etc. If you haven’t worn/used something in the past 1-2 years, you probably never will. For every new shirt you add, give one away.
56. Worrying accomplishes nothing. In fact, it’s counter-productive. Spend that energy working the problem, if there’s something about the problem you can work on.
57. Back up your home movies to DVD or the Cloud before they get brittle.
58. Don’t respond to everything you disagree with on social media. Few arguments are won there. Just keep scrolling, and spend that energy on proclaiming Jesus.
59. Trauma is both a psychological and physical event. If you know someone experiencing a mental health challenge, short or long term, reach out and encourage them to get help and not bury it.  
60. “Do everything without complaining or arguing.” (Philippians 2:14).  But what about _________________?  It says “everything”.  No one wants to hear your griping or mine.
61. Go on a vacation to the Holy Lands…it’ll change the way you understand the Bible. Also, visit Rothenburg, Germany in winter and do the Night watchman Tour while it’s snowing. Walk the ruins of Pompeii and tell your young sons this is what can happen “if you are bad”. Ride camels in Petra, Jordan and pink jeeps in Sedona, Arizona. Just get out and see and do stuff outside of your home state/country.
62. Don’t over-spend on clothes. Do over-spend on high quality running/hiking shoes. For hikers/backpackers, splurge on things that touch the ground—your shoes, tent, and sleeping bag.
63. It’s possible to have a unique, substantial, well-rounded meal at Costco by circling the store 4-5 times while the wife shops.
64. Make “Random Acts of Kindness” part of your DNA. Just do stuff for people and don’t tell anyone.
65. A lot of what happens to you in life won’t make sense at the time.  However, you’ll be amazed at how many times you can look back on things that happened and see how God was connecting dots and bringing about good from the situation.
66. When you’re making a list of 60 things, don’t be afraid to do 66 instead. It’s your list. Just be thankful readers made it all the way to the end!

“I will instruct you and teach you in the way you should go; I will counsel you with my eye upon you.” – Psalm 32:8

Christian Newsome shared a wonderful analogy using the Kansas City Chiefs. After each offensive play, quarterback Patrick Mahomes raises his hand and wiggles his fingers. In a documentary, he explained that this is his way of signaling to the coach on the sideline that he’s listening and ready for the next play.

When we step inside our houses of worship each week, we need to do the same. God wants us to be keenly interested in “What’s the play this week?” “I’m listening.” You see coming to church is not the game. It’s the huddle with teammates so that we can go play the game once worship is over. While reflecting on this idea, my wife Janet commented, “That’s one of the reasons being in the huddle—being with the church—is so important. If you’re absent, you miss the play call and the opportunity to encourage the team.”

Once Mahomes wiggles his fingers, the head coach relays the play to the offensive coordinator, who passes it on to Mahomes, who informs the team. The play doesn’t always go as designed. Linemen jump offsides. Receivers drop passes. Heavy rain suddenly begins to pour. The game of football can get messy at times. But you know what will make it even messier? If the quarterback and the team don’t have the play—if they line up with no instructions from the head coach. 

So, Christians, in 2026, let’s walk into our houses of worship and wiggle our fingers. “God, who do you want me to notice this week?” “Who do you want me to talk to about Jesus this week?” “God, who do you want me to reach out to this week?” “I’m listening—what’s the play?” The note from the margin reads: We seek God’s guidance because we love Him and want to please Him. We want to follow His instructions. In John 14:15, Jesus says, “If you love me, you will keep my commandments.” 

Again, the church coming together is not the play—it’s the huddle. When a church functions as the huddle, life becomes the play. We come together and ask God, “What’s the play today?” God says, “Go make disciples. Go tell people about Jesus. Ready. Break!” We then depart our church buildings and head out into the world, with the play on our minds, determined to execute our parts as best we can. 

What can we do in addition to coming together, wiggling our fingers, and asking God for the play each week? We can do so every morning, before we get out of bed—perhaps after spending some time in the playbook.

C.S. Lewis wrote, “Everyone thinks forgiveness is a lovely idea…until they have someone to forgive.”

Today’s parable—the final in our series—is about the immense mercy and forgiveness God has shown to us and how we should show that same mercy and forgiveness to those around us. When we don’t, there are serious consequences. Please take a moment to read Matthew 18:21-35. 

So, it begins with Peter asking how often to forgive. Why ask that? We tend to look for the minimum requirement. As a child, “How many green beans do I have to eat?” As a student, “How much of the assignment must we do?” You may recall, in an earlier parable, the legal expert asking Jesus, “Who is my neighbor?” The goal is to lower the standard to help ensure compliance/righteousness.

It would be convenient for Jesus to answer “3” or “5” or even “7” as suggested by Peter. Forgiving someone 7 times seems reasonable. Three times was the accepted limit taught by many Jewish rabbis at the time. Seven seems generous, way over the top, actually. Have you ever forgiven someone 7 times? Seems like a lot.

Instead, what does Jesus say? 77 times! Some translations say “70 x 7” or 490 times! What’s He saying? That we stop forgiving someone after the 77^th or 490^th offense? No, He means our forgiveness should be unlimited, extremely generous. 

So, in our story, a servant owes his king an incredible amount of money. 10,000 talents is 375 tons of silver which equates to about $1.25 billion in today’s dollars. Unless you’re Elon Musk, that’s a lot of money. The point is the man would never be able to satisfy the debt.

To recoup the debt, the king intended to sell the servant, his family, and their property. (Normally, a king would put the servant in prison and sell his family into slavery.) This sounds weird to us, but there were lots of slaves in that society. Today, we’d take someone to court and get money from their estate, future earnings, etc.

Imagine you’re that servant and the king is about to auction you off and possibly break up your family. How devastating! And, by the way, the king is only going to get at most 1 talent per person and usually far less, like .1 talent/person. That won’t cover the debt but there would be a measure of justice. The servant begs for more time to pay, which is quite an empty gesture. The debt was far beyond his ability to pay. It’s laughable that he considered the only issue to be the king’s patience.  

Fortunately for the servant and his family, the king has a change of heart. Moved by compassion, he decides not only to not sell the servant and his family and possessions, but to forgive the debt! They don’t have to pay $1.25 billion! Happy ending, right? Not so fast!

The servant encounters another servant who owes him money—100 denarii—a common laborer’s daily wage x 100. Today, that’s roughly $13,700. Still a lot of money, but far less than $1.25B! 

What’s the servant do? He demands payment and starts choking the guy! The second servant begs for mercy—for more time. Sound familiar? No mercy is given. He puts the guy in prison until the debt is repaid in full. 

The king finds out from other servants—not because the offender repented. Outraged, he summons the first servant: “I forgave you your entire debt because you begged me to. Should you not have had pity on your fellow servant, as I had pity on you?”  The king has the servant put in prison (some translations say he’s handed over to “torturers”) until he pays back the original loan in full. Effectively, that’s eternal punishment. 

Had Jesus stopped there, we’d be left with a tragic tale of a servant who didn’t forgive. Shame on him! He got what he deserved. But Jesus concludes the parable on a very ominous note, saying that the same fate awaits each one of us if we fail to forgive others from the heart. “So also my heavenly Father will do to every one of you, if you do not forgive your brother from your heart.” As Saint Francis of Assisi put it, “It is in pardoning that we are pardoned.”

In other words, God the Father’s forgiveness, which we have already been given, will be withdrawn at the final judgment if we do not imitate this forgiveness in our relationships with each other. One commentator put it this way: “The principle is clear. God has forgiven such a great debt, that any debt owed to us is absolutely insignificant in comparison. No man can possibly offend me to the extent that my sins have offended God. This principle must be applied in the little things done to us, but also to the great things done unto us.”

One of the unchanging rules of the Kingdom of God: What we do to others will be done to us – eternally! For example, in Matthew 6:12, “Forgive us our debts, as we forgive our debtors.” Or, from Luke 6:37-38: “Do not judge, and you will not be judged. Do not condemn, and you will not be condemned. Forgive, and you will be forgiven. Give, and it will be given to you. A good measure, pressed down, shaken together and running over, will be poured into your lap. For with the measure you use, it will be measured to you.” So, in giving, forgiving, judging, etc., the measure I use toward others, God will use toward me. Friends, that puts forgiveness in a whole new light. If I forgive a little, I will be forgiven a little. If I forgive a lot, I will be forgiven a lot.

Allow me to get personal for a moment. How much do you need forgiven? How much daily? Monthly? Yearly? Let’s start with the sin that gives you the most problem. We probably all have one we’re thinking of—one sin or category of sin that gives us the most trouble. I want you to mentally go to a white board and write it out on the board. Now, step back and give it a look. How often have you committed that sin in the past 24 hours? Write that number underneath it. How about in the past week? How about the past year? What’s your total? Mentally go to the board and write that number down under the sin. How about during the course of your life? What’s your best guess? Do the math. Write it down.

Was it three times? Seven times? Seventy-seven times? 490 times? 

How many times does it need to be forgiven for you to go to heaven? Answer: Every time! And that’s just for that one sin category. If you’re like me, and I suspect you are, there are a lot more sin categories! Good luck on estimating your total number of sins—of commission and omission—across all sin categories. We’re going to need a calculator! And we’re in need of God’s grace & mercy. The blood of Jesus is our only hope! If we expect Him to forgive us, we’ve got to forgive others—that’s the bottom line.

Let’s dive deeper and look at five related questions:

1. Are we required to “forgive and forget”? Is that even possible? 

The reality is we can’t always forget. If you’ve been sexually abused, or had a loved one killed by a drunk driver, you may be able to forgive the offender on some level, but it’s unlikely you will forget that it happened. I’ve never been sexually abused, but I have been hurt or wronged a few times, even by loved ones and people I thought were trustworthy friends. I have forgiven the people involved, but I still remember the incidents. I wish that I didn’t. I wish that I could magically erase that portion of the hard drive. Some wrongs I surely have forgotten, aided in part by getting older and not remembering lots of things. But that’s not mandatory for forgiveness to occur.

Earlier this year, Charlie Kirk’s widow said that she forgave his killer and I believe her. But she’ll never forget that moment, or her husband, or the crime committed against him. So, even if we can’t “forgive and forget”… at least “forgive and remember”. And be thankful for a God who can, through the sacrifice of His Son, erase our entire sin hard drive!

2. What about “forgiving unconditionally” vs “forgiving conditionally”?

Unconditionally means there are no strings attached. Conditionally means just that—there are conditions. “You must wallow at my feet for 24 hours!” “You must suffer for a while!” What about “I’ll forgive you, but you must never do that thing again!” That one is hard. But think back to God forgiving you of the sin that causes the most problems for you. What if God said, “I’ll forgive you once, but that’s it!”

Does God forgive conditionally? Yes! He loves us unconditionally but forgives conditionally. How so? We must be a Christian—washed in the blood of Christ. That’s where we find our forgiveness. Also, we must forgive others—the main point of this parable. 1 John 4:11 states, “Dear friends, since God so loved us, we also ought to love one another.”

3. Are there sometimes consequences, even when we forgive someone? 

Yes! For example, adultery is biblical grounds to divorce someone. So, it’s possible that a woman forgives her husband and they remain married. But she also has biblical grounds to divorce him. And I certainly don’t think she has to stay in that relationship while he cheats on her 77 times! The same goes for abuse. A woman is not required to remain in a home where she is repeatedly abused, under the guise of forgiveness. And even if she forgives her husband, the perpetrator may still go to jail. One commentator put it this way: “While extending forgiveness as the wronged person is a necessary step for reconciliation, your willingness to forgive does not obligate you to restore the relationship or trust the person.”

The same goes for a friend who takes advantage of me financially. They borrow money for one stated, legit purpose but use it for an illegit purpose. I can forgive them, but I don’t have to keep giving them money. Nor do I have to hang out with them. Forgiveness and consequences can coincide and often do.

4. How does our forgiveness (or lack thereof) affect our Christian witness?

It stands out. It’s noticed. Part of letting our light shine is showing the world how we respond to being wronged. Jesus called it “turning the other cheek”.

Years ago, I wrote a devotional entitled “Forgiving As We’re Forgiven” for my book Faith in the Margins… 

On October 2, 2006, Charles Carl Roberts walked into an Amish one-room schoolhouse in Lancaster County, Pennsylvania. Angry with God over the death of his newborn daughter nine years earlier, he took hostages and ultimately shot eight of 10 girls (ages 6-13), killing five, before taking his own life.

The mass killing devastated the small Amish community and made headlines nationwide. The enduring legacy of the horrific event, however, has more to do with forgiveness than the taking of innocent human life. The Amish community that lost so much didn’t hesitate to forgive the killer and reach out to his family.

• A grandfather of one of the victims warned other relatives not to hate or think evil of the killer.
• Another Amish community member reached out to the Roberts family hours after the shooting to offer comfort and forgiveness to them.
• An Amish man reportedly held Robert’s sobbing father in his arms for an hour to comfort him.
• The Amish community set up a charitable fund for Roberts’ family.
• About 30 Amish community members attended Roberts’ funeral. Additionally, Marie Roberts, the killer’s widow, was one of only a few outsiders to be invited to attend the funeral of one of the young victims.

The Amish community’s amazing expressions of forgiveness touched our nation and helped the Roberts family to heal. Marie Roberts, in an open letter to her Amish neighbors, wrote, “Your love for our family has helped to provide the healing we so desperately need. Gifts you’ve given have touched our hearts in a way no words can describe. Your compassion has reached beyond our family, beyond our community, and is changing our world, and for this we sincerely thank you.”

In Genesis 45, Joseph reunites with his brothers who have hated him, plotted against him, left him for dead in a pit, and later sold him as a slave to some traveling Midianites. In verses 14-15, we read, “Then he threw his arms around his brother Benjamin and wept, and Benjamin embraced him, weeping. And he kissed all his brothers and wept over them. Afterward his brothers talked with him.” It would be understandable for Joseph, in his position of authority, to express anger and bitterness toward his brothers and exact revenge. Instead, Joseph, like the Amish community, shows mercy and forgiveness. What a wonderful example of forgiveness. The scars and wounds are still there. But when we forgive others as God forgives us, healing can occur.

5. Must we forgive someone who doesn’t repent?

There are 2 schools of thought. I’ll cover each…

School #1: No, you mustn’t forgive someone who doesn’t repent. Biblical forgiveness is generally not extended without repentance. Part of being right with God and receiving forgiveness is that we repent, among other things. If I haven’t repented, I can’t expect God to forgive me. If that were the case, Jesus wouldn’t have had to die on a cross. (See Acts 2:38)

Luke 17:3-4 seems to clearly state that forgiveness is conditioned on repentance: “Pay attention to yourselves! If your brother sins, rebuke him, and if he repents, forgive him, and if he sins against you seven times in the day, and turns to you seven times, saying, ‘I repent,’ you must forgive him.”

Some argue that to forgive someone who hasn’t repented is to put oneself above God–an attempt to “out forgive” God–which is itself problematic and possibly even sinful (under School #1).

Even if Christians aren’t called to forgive the unrepentant, we should maintain a spirit of forgiveness and be ready to forgive when repentance occurs. Even without repentance, a Christian can “forgive” by: 1) Choosing not to hold onto bitterness, which hurts them more than the offender and may hinder the offender from repenting, and 2) By leaving vengeance to God—He will judge justly.

School #2: Some scholars see it differently. They believe we should forgive an unrepentant sinner. One commentator makes the case this way: “That thinking [School #1] is wrong, because I do not stand in the same place as God in the equation, and I never can. God stands as One who has never been forgiven and never needed forgiveness; I stand as one who has been forgiven and needs continual forgiveness. Therefore – if it were possible – we should be far quicker to forgive than God is, without precondition of repentance, because we stand as forgiven sinners who must also forgive. We have an even greater obligation to forgive than God does… Since we have been forgiven so much, we have no right to withhold forgiveness from others. We are the debtor forgiven almost an infinite debt; will we hold on to the small debts others owe to us? If anyone had the right to withhold forgiveness it is God – and He forgives more freely and more completely than anyone we know. What possible right do we have to hold on to our unforgiveness?”

You can decide for yourself which view you align with. The parables are designed to get us thinking and I hope this parable, and this question in particular, have caused you to do that. Regardless of how you answer the question, the point of the parable is for us to be more forgiving—excessive, extreme, over the top–like the forgiveness God extends to us. 

Luke 6:36 states, “Be merciful, even as your Father is merciful.” Let’s strive to do that. 

Put another way, “Give out forgiveness like it’s someone else’s money.”

I hope you have enjoyed our study of the parables. Perhaps we can examine additional ones in the future. 

Thanks for reading!

And Merry Christmas!

In today’s study, we shift from parables about lost things to a parable about being ready for Christ’s return. Please take a moment to read Matthew 25:1-13.

For context, understand there were three stages to a Jewish wedding in that day:

1.  Engagement – a formal agreement was made by the fathers. 

2. Betrothal – a ceremony was held in which mutual promises were made. This was analogous to what we consider an engagement, but even more so. It was a big deal—sealed the deal. It’s why Mary becoming pregnant while betrothed to Joseph was such a potential scandal.

3. Marriage – after betrothal, the man returned to his father’s house/family compound and spent about a year securing and preparing a room for him and his bride. Around then, he would return for his bride at an unexpected time and the marriage ceremony would begin. (This is why the language of John 14:2-3 would have resonated with the orginal hearers: “In my Father’s house are many rooms. If it were not so, would I have told you that I go to prepare a place for you?  And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come again and will take you to myself, that where I am you may be also.” Jesus, the bridegroom, will one day return to claim the church, His bride.) 

Back to the Jewish wedding… When the bridegroom returned unannounced, the bridesmaids (aka virgins or maidens) who were attending the bride, would go out to meet the bridegroom, with lamps lighted. They would lead him, his companions, and the bride on a processional back to his house, where the wedding feast and other events would occur, including the consummation of their marriage.

So, that’s the basic sequence… engagement, betrothal, and marriage. This parable picks up in the period after step 2, the betrothal. 

The main characters are the 10 virgins. Who do they represent? In Revelation 10, a woman represents a church; so, it seems we’re talking about people who profess to be Christians, although there are a few different interpretations we’ll get to.

What’s the significance of them being virgins? This relates to purity. Back in Old Testament times, purity was a huge deal—as it should be today. If a woman claimed to be pure but wasn’t, she could be severely punished. Once again, there are parallels to Christ and His bride, the church. In 2 Corinthians 11:2, Paul writes, “I am jealous for you with a godly jealousy. I promised you to one husband, to Christ, so that I might present you as a pure virgin to him.” So, as Christians, we’re engaged to Christ, so to speak, and should strive to remain pure for Him until His return.

Why 10 virgins? Ten was a big number in Jewish society—it would have resonated with them. It takes…

• 10 men to hold a synagogue; 10 present to confirm a circumcision; 10 in a house to keep the Passover; 10 present at a marriage contract; common size of a wedding party; Boaz had 10 witnesses at his marriage (Ruth 4:2); God would spared the city for 10 righteous people (Gen. 18:32); 10 camels loaded down with gifts for Rebekah (Gen. 24:10); Rebekah stayed 10 days before leaving (Gen. 24:55); Joseph had 10 brothers that went to Egypt (Gen. 42:3); The Tabernacle had 10 curtains (Ex. 26:1); God gave 10 commandments (Deut. 4:13); Solomon had 10 tables in the temple, 10 lavers of water, 10 golden candlesticks (2 Chron. 4:6-8); Christ will return with 10,000 Saints (Jude 14)

Thus, 10 is significant to Jews in their religious life.

So, a couple got engaged and then the bride chose 10 bridesmaids. Their job?

• They saw to it that she remained faithful—no wandering eyes for another man. “Hey, you’re committed to someone already! He’s coming back. Knock it off!”
• They reassured her if she had doubts—“It’s been a year; do you think he still loves me?” (We do the same thing! “God, you haven’t answered my prayer. I just don’t know if you love me anymore.”)
• They kept her presentable, ready for the groom—not running around with “rollers in her hair”—“You’ve got to be ready!”
• Taken together, the virgins represent a pure woman or God’s pure church.

The Bridegroom? That’s Christ. From Luke 5:34: “And Jesus said to them, ‘Can you make wedding guests fast while the bridegroom is with them?’” (See also Ephesians 5:24-27, Isaiah 62:5, Matthew 9:15, Mark 2:19, & 2 Corinthians 11:2)

The Lamps? The Word of God. Psalm 119:105 states, “Your word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path.”

So, the first problem is that with the bridegroom away, all 10 virgins are sleeping. All of them. Christians, you may say you’re not asleep, that you’re anxiously waiting for Christ’s return. But is that actually the case? We say we believe that Jesus will return some day, right? But let’s be honest, we don’t really believe He’s coming any time soon. If we truly thought Jesus was returning by the end of the year, how would we spend the rest of the month? If you truly believed He was coming at midnight tonight, how would you spend your day? Would you make some phone calls or visits to loved ones? Would you make a last ditch effort to save someone? I wouldn’t clean house, I can assure you of that!

The reality is that most of us believe He’s coming one day, just not “soon”—not today. And that will also be the case tomorrow. So, whether we’re saved or not, this parable has a message for all of us. Again, all of the virgins were sleeping.

So, today, let’s do some soul-searching, some introspection. Can we do that? Is that okay?

Here’s the question: Are you preparing for Jesus’ return? Or are you sleeping? Be honest—this is between you (and me) and God.

How can you know? Are you studying your Bible regularly, earnestly seeking to know God’s will? Are you praying fervently, wanting to talk to God as you make final preparations? Are you evangelizing in any way, knowing that time is running out? When’s the last time you shared your faith in any way with a non-Christian? Is attending your congregation’s worship services/Bible studies (whenever they occur) a priority–must do events? Or, are we just too busy with other activities to congregate with the people we claim to want to spend eternity with?

Christians, are we actively preparing for His return—in a constant state of readiness—or are we sleeping like these virgins? How would we really act if we knew Jesus was coming soon, even tonight?

When the 10 virgins went to meet the bridegroom, what did they all take with them? Lamps. There were two types of lamps: a small one you’d carry and a larger one on a pole that you’d take to the processional. So, figuratively, these Bible-believing, Bible-toting people believe that the bridegroom (Christ) is coming—that it’s time for the big event—and go to meet him. If the story stopped here, all good! Pure, Bible-believing, lamp-carrying followers of Christ have gone to meet Him and will then head off together for the wedding, to then live happily ever after. 

But… verse 2 says 5 are wise and 5 are foolish. What happened? What went wrong?

The Greek word “moros”—where we get the word moron—means “dull in thinking; unprepared; not anticipating” vs. “wise, alert, ready, thinking ahead”. A wise bridesmaid would think ahead—“What if the groom is delayed? I’ve got to make sure I have enough oil!” Their torches consisted of a wooden staff held in their hand, with a dish at the top, in which was a piece of cloth or rope dipped in oil or pitch. The foolish maidens had the lamp, the Word of God, but were missing the oil. (This would be like going on a camping trip with a flashlight but no batteries.)

So, is it possible to have the lamp (the Bible) but miss the oil? Is that what this is referring to? Maybe. Oil is often used in Scripture to represent the Holy Spirit—an anointing. See Zechariah 4:1-7. The following chart compares oil to the Holy Spirit:

OLIVE OIL	HOLY SPIRIT
Oil lubricates when used for that purpose.	There is little friction and wear among those who are lubricated by the Spirit of God.
Oil heals and was used as a medicinal treatment in Biblical times (See Luke 10:34).	The Spirit of God brings healing and restoration.
Oil lights when it is burned in a lamp.	Where the Spirit of God is, there is light.
Oil warms when it is used as fuel for a flame.	Where the Spirit of God is, there is warmth and comfort.
Oil invigorates when used to massage.	The Holy Spirit invigorates us for His service.
Oil adorns when applied as a perfume.	The Holy Spirit adorns us and makes us more pleasant to be around.
Oil polishes when used to shine metal.	The Holy Spirit wipes away our grime and smooths out our rough edges.

Thus, it seems all the maidens have lamps (their Bibles) but only some (half) have the subduing, softening grace of the Holy Spirit—the oil. That’s a problem. Ephesians 5:18 states, “And do not get drunk with wine, for that is debauchery, but be filled with the Spirit.” In John 3:5, Jesus answered, “Very truly I tell you, no one can enter the kingdom of God unless they are born of water and the Spirit.” Christians, God’s Spirit is to shine through us—it’s part of our new birth in Christ. As one commentator put it, “Much of the weakness, defeat and lethargy in our spiritual lives can be explained if we are not constantly being filled with the Holy Spirit.”

Without oil half the wedding party was not ready for the bridegroom. And without the Holy Spirit, no one is ready for the return of Jesus. Put another way, no one can be a true Christian without the indwelling of the Holy Spirit. Romans 8:9 states, “Now if anyone does not have the Spirit of Christ, he is not His.” High stakes, for sure.

With that in mind, consider this: Is it possible for us to “have a Bible” (the lamp) but not really be into it? We’re just going through the motions. We carry it but we don’t read it. Or we read it but neither meditate on it nor apply it. If God’s Word is some sort of joke to me—I don’t take it seriously—then how can God’s Spirit be in me? Is it possible God would say to us what He said to the church in Laodicea in Revelation 3:14-15: “I know your works: you are neither cold nor hot. Would that you were either cold or hot! So, because you are lukewarm, and neither hot nor cold, I will spit you out of my mouth.”

What happened while the bridegroom was away? They all slumbered and slept—they got tired and weary from waiting. Your preachers, parents, grandparents, Bible class teachers, even your song leaders, have been telling you “Jesus is coming soon! Morning or night or noon!” You may respond, “Well, how long do I have to wait?! He hasn’t come yet!”

Here’s the thing: we just don’t know when! Christ could return at midnight tonight, or before you finish reading this lesson, or 1000 years from now. We just don’t know. It’s easy to get discouraged. Even sincere, legit Christians who are filled with the Holy Spirit get discouraged and sleep; again, all 10 virgins—those with and without oil—were asleep.

The reality is, a day is coming when the Bridegroom is going to return and wake us all up. Those who haven’t been born again, who don’t have the Spirit, can’t suddenly turn to those who do and borrow some oil. That’s based on the interpretation (which I align with) that all 10 maidens are professing Christians, since they all have lamps, but only five have the Holy Spirit. Alternatively, some scholars believe the 5 & 5 virgins represent Christians and non-Christians. Still others think the 5 wise virgins represent Gentile Christians who accepted Christ and were full of the Spirit (lamp + oil) and the 5 foolish ones were the Jews who were originally God’s chosen people and had the Word (lamp) but not the Spirit (oil).

Regardless of your interpretation, the point is the same: We must be ready for Christ’s return! Even though all 10 bridesmaids expected to go to the wedding feast (heaven), 5 of them aren’t ready for the bridegroom’s return and the other 5 can’t save them. My friend David is a solid, Christian friend. As best I can tell, he’s filled with the Spirit—plenty of oil in his lamp. But when Christ returns, I can’t say, “Hey, Bro, can you hook me up? I forgot my oil. I’m not ready. I’ve been coasting in my faith.” As much as he might want to, it will be too late. Each of us have to have our own conversion story.

Ellen White puts it this way: “The class represented by the foolish virgins are not hypocrites. They have a regard for the truth, they have advocated the truth, they are attracted to those who believe the truth; but they have not yielded themselves to the Holy Spirit’s working. They have not fallen upon the Rock, Christ Jesus, and permitted their old nature to be broken up. This class are represented also by the stony-ground hearers. They receive the word with readiness, but they fail of assimilating its principles. Its influence is not abiding. The Spirit works upon man’s heart, according to his desire and consent implanting in him a new nature; but the class represented by the foolish virgins have been content with a superficial work. They do not know God. They have not studied His character; they have not held communion with Him; therefore, they do not know how to trust, how to look and live. Their service to God degenerates into a form.”

These foolish virgins try at the last minute to buy oil but it’s too late— “I know ye not.” That’s a severe penalty for the foolish maidens. The door was shut, never to be opened again. 1 John 4:8 states, “Whoever does not love does not know God, because God is love.” In Matthew 7:23, Jesus says, “Then I will tell them plainly, ‘I never knew you. Away from me, you evildoers!’”

These foolish virgins had their lamps—carried their Bibles around—but they were missing the Spirit. The Bible was just words on a page, like studying Geometry. And they were missing love. They weren’t ready.

Among the several thoughtful comments shared by students in my Bible class yesterday, I’d like to summarize three of them:

1. it possible the 5 wise virgins were asleep when the bridegroom returned because they were, in fact, ready? They had their lamp and sufficient oil–they were good to go. When we’re Christians, washed by the blood of the lamb, we should be confident of our salvation. We should be able to sleep soundly knowing that whenever Christ returns, even in the middle of the night, we’re ready for Him. (Does it bother me when my wife, on the fly, makes an insightful, contrarian point which is probably more accurate than my conclusion after two weeks of study? Of course not! Being married to someone who knows and loves the Word is one of life’s greatest blessings.)

2. Perhaps the foolish virgins tried to borrow oil from the wise ones because borrowing from others is what they had been doing all their lives. Maybe they had “borrowed” their parents’ or grandparents’ faith but had never made it their own. They never owned it–made it personal. So, at crunch time, when they needed it most, they didn’t have it and, sadly, were unable to borrow it.

3. While we don’t know when the bridegroom (Christ) will return, we also don’t know when we’ll die. People die unexpectedly all the time–car accidents, heart attacks, mass shootings, etc. So, another reason to be in a constant state of readiness is that we don’t know when our time will be up. We may die instantly and not have an opportunity to get ready.

Christians, Jesus should be a dear friend—someone we have a relationship with; someone we’re close to. Not just some historical figure. The message of the parable? Be ready. Love God and be filled with the Spirit. Because when Jesus, the Bridegroom, comes back, He’s coming for those who love him. He’s coming for his bride—the church. And the price for failing to be ready is too high.

Homework: The Great Supper, read Luke 14:15-24

How far did Christ go to save us? If you were lost now, to what lengths would He go to find you? Those are critical questions for all humanity and are especially important to those who find themselves lost. 

Let’s begin this week’s study in Luke 15:1-2: “Now the tax collectors and sinners were all gathering around to hear Jesus. But the Pharisees and the teachers of the law muttered, ‘This man welcomes sinners and eats with them.’”

We’ve come to expect this from the self-righteous, holier-than-thou Pharisees. They felt superior to, looked down upon, and tried to avoid sinners. Thus, they’re critical of Jesus for hanging out with such people. They’re thinking: “If He’s really the Holy Messiah, shouldn’t He be hanging out with righteous people like us!”

Our culture loves to divide people between “us” and “them” based on a host of factors—race, gender, age, ethnicity, wealth, politics, and sometimes even frequency/severity of sin. But God is a god of unity. He loves everyone equally (See Acts 10:34). The only categories that matter are those who are in Christ (i.e., Christians, those who are saved) and those who are outside of Christ (i.e., the lost). As Jesus Himself put it in John 14:6, “I am the way, and the truth, and the life. No one comes to the Father except through me.” Christ’s love for and pursuit of humanity, especially the lost, is extraordinary. 

To set the stage for the first in a series of parables about “lost” things, consider what we know about sheep. Perhaps the most descriptive word is helpless. Lacking claws or sharp teeth, they can’t defend themselves. They also lack speed and common sense. Like a helpless child, they depend on an outside source—usually a shepherd and dog—to guide and protect them. Otherwise, they’ll wander off or get killed. 

From Luke 15:3-7 – “Then Jesus told them this parable: ‘Suppose one of you has a hundred sheep and loses one of them. Doesn’t he leave the ninety-nine in the open country and go after the lost sheep until he finds it? And when he finds it, he joyfully puts it on his shoulders and goes home. Then he calls his friends and neighbors together and says, ‘Rejoice with me; I have found my lost sheep.’ I tell you that in the same way there will be more rejoicing in heaven over one sinner who repents than over ninety-nine righteous persons who do not need to repent.’”

The Shepherd is Jesus. John 10:11 states, “I am the good shepherd. The good shepherd lays down his life for the sheep.” In Matthew 15:24, Jesus answered, “I was sent only to the lost sheep of Israel.”

The lost sheep represents anyone who has gone astray. 1 Peter 2:25 states, “For ‘you were like sheep going astray,’ but now you have returned to the Shepherd and Overseer of your souls.” Isaiah 53:6 adds, “We all, like sheep, have gone astray, each of us has turned to our own way; and the Lord has laid on him the iniquity of us all.” So, in addition to anyone else I might see as the sheep in this parable, I need to see myself.

What did the Shepherd do to save the lost sheep? He left the 99 to go after the 1 who was lost. The lost sheep is not going to save himself. Similarly, Christ left all of heaven to seek and save us. Many rabbis of that time believed that God received the sinner who came to Him the right way—groveling. Even today, we may feel some satisfaction seeing a crushed soul respond to the invitation in tears, confessing their sins. But here, Jesus taught that God actively seeks out the lost. He doesn’t grudgingly wait on them to come to Him. Instead, He searches for them. As one commentary puts it, “God finds the sinner more than the sinner finds God.” This was a new concept for them and may not fit our concept of the lost sinner having to find God. 

When a shepherd realizes a sheep is gone, it consumes him. He worries and doesn’t rest. He goes after the sheep and the longer the sheep is lost, the more frantically he searches. He’ll do whatever it takes.

Imagine your dog escapes the backyard fence and is roaming the neighborhood, lost. This was a common occurrence for us with Penny (the pinscher) and Mandy (the beagle, who’s now dead) back in the day. I climbed over countless neighbors’ fences searching for those ornery dogs.

Now let’s up the ante. Your young child wanders off from the campsite during a camping trip. She’s nowhere to be found. To what lengths would you go to find her? Would you say, “Honey, we’ve been searching for her for two hours! It’s getting dark. Let’s get some rest and we’ll resume our search in the morning.”  Of course not! You’re frantic. You’re not going to stop until your daughter is found, even if that requires activating the National Guard. 

In the ancient hymn “There Were Ninety and Nine” written by Elizabeth Clephane in 1868, we find these lyrics:  

But none of the ransomed ever knew
How deep were the waters crossed,
Nor how dark was the night the Lord pass’d
Ere he found his sheep that was lost.
Out in the desert he heard its cry—
Sick and helpless and ready to die.

“Lord, what are these blood drops all the way
That mark out the mountain’s track?”
“They were shed for the one who’d gone astray
Ere the Shepherd could bring him back.
“Lord, why are these hands so rent and torn?”
“They’re pierced tonight by many a thorn.”

I picture the shepherd, after a long, exhausting search, finally hearing the lost sheep. As the sheep’s cry grows feinter and it nears death, he finds it. Notice, in the parable, he doesn’t punish, reprimand, or beat the lost sheep. He doesn’t make it grovel to the front pew. He doesn’t even walk it home. No, what’s he do? “And when he finds it, he joyfully puts it on his shoulders.” (Luke 15:5) What does it take to put something on your shoulders? You must pick it up! God does the same with us! He lifted us from our misery and our sin and put us on His shoulders. He went looking for us when we were lost and protected us from danger. And then He carried us home. Can I get an Amen?

Have you ever rescued someone? Have you located a lost, crying child at Walmart? Have you posted bail for someone at a jail? Have you ever gone to a bar to retrieve a drunk friend (or an Airman who works in your squadron) and drive him home? What about someone dealing with a tragedy, a crisis, or a loss of faith? Christians, have you ever joyfully put someone on your shoulders? Or have you ever been in a tough spot, lost, and had someone put you on their shoulders? Whether you’re the rescuer or the one being rescued, it is a beautiful thing.

What does the shepherd do after bringing the lost sheep home? He rejoices! Throws a party! That same rejoicing is going on in heaven. We don’t often think of God as rejoicing, but this passage tells us He does, and in what circumstances. “As the bridegroom rejoices over the bride, so shall your God rejoice over you.” (Isaiah 62:5) Fellas, remember what it was like when you first looked up and saw your beautiful bride in her wedding gown, walking down the aisle toward you? Remember the excitement, the goose bumps, how proud you were of her? That’s how God rejoices over us. Zephaniah 3:17 adds, “The LORD your God in your midst, The Mighty One, will save; He will rejoice over you with gladness, He will quiet you with His love, He will rejoice over you with singing.” God is your biggest fan.

The religious people of Jesus’ day believed differently and even had a saying: “There will be joy in heaven over one sinner who is obliterated before God.” Christians today must be careful that we do not give the same impression, especially in our often-appropriate zeal to speak out against culturally popular sins. It’s interesting that, even though the tax collectors and sinners were gathering around Jesus (with an opportunity to be saved), the Pharisees weren’t rejoicing over that.

When we get lost, we cannot find our way back. But we think we can. “If I just try a little harder.” Instead, we need the divine love of God to save us. It’s true for lost sinners. It’s true for our world. “If my people, who are called by my name, will humble themselves and pray and seek my face and turn from their wicked ways, then I will hear from heaven, and I will forgive their sin and will heal their land.” (2 Chronicles 7:14) God’s love can save us but we still need to turn from our wicked ways—to repent (See Luke 15:7).

During my time serving as an elder at a church in Florida, we divided the congregation into five “flocks” and each of us shepherds was assigned one. While we cared for the entire congregation, I was especially focused on those in my flock. We used attendance cards to track attendance and identify the missing. At regular elders meetings, we prayed for those who were missing by name. We also reached out to them via phone calls, visits, and e-mails—whatever it took. They were missing from the flock. They were the lost child on the camping trip. We went looking for them.

Keeping with that theme, Jesus told another parable in Luke 15:8-10: “Or suppose a woman has ten silver coins and loses one. Doesn’t she light a lamp, sweep the house and search carefully until she finds it? And when she finds it, she calls her friends and neighbors together and says, ‘Rejoice with me; I have found my lost coin.’ In the same way, I tell you, there is rejoicing in the presence of the angels of God over one sinner who repents.”

The Pharisees didn’t like the first parable, because they considered themselves better than shepherds. The same goes for this story about a woman—a second class citizen in that world. 

The coin, like the sheep, represents those who are lost in their sins, apart from God. The silver coin—a drachma—was a full day’s wage. We’re not talking about a lost penny. The woman represents God seeking the lost and also, hopefully, Christians—the church, God’s ambassadors—who should be involved in that search.

Have you ever lost money in your house? How about your keys. It can be highly frustrating knowing they are somewhere. During my formative years, whenever my dad lost his keys, he would have the family line up from one side of the house to the other. Step by step, inch by inch, we did a 100% sweep of the premises, opening every drawer and looking under every cushion. It consumed him (and thus us) until the keys were found. 

Aside from the main point, already discussed with the lost sheep, here are 10 additional applications:

1. Does the coin realize it’s lost? No. The same can be said for lost souls today. People are often oblivious to their spiritual condition. They are in danger but unaware and unconcerned. I hope that doesn’t describe you. We have a sense of urgency when someone cries out for help. Do we have the same urgency when they do not, even though we’re aware of the danger?

2. Even in a good environment, home or church, a person may still be lost. Growing up in a good, Christian home doesn’t make you immune from falling away. I’ve known many teenagers and young adults who have lost their faith and fallen away, even though they were raised by good Christian parents.

3. Unlike the sheep, the coin did not run off. Its condition is the result of the carelessness of another. The sin of one person can have tragic spiritual consequences on someone else. Our poor choices—our sin—can have ripple effects across generations.

4. The coin falls to the floor—the dirtiest place in the house. Without God, that’s where we all end up. As we’ll see next week, where does the lost son end up? In a pig pen.

5. Still, the coin still has value, even in the dust. Even if there are 9 other coins. What’s at stake is the woman’s ability to use the coin toward some purpose. That’s why she seeks it. But the coin itself is still worth something. It still has its full value. That’s why God seeks us. Regardless of what deep hole we’re in, we still bear the image of God. We still have incredible value. Every day, He sweeps the house.

6. God will go to great lengths to find us. In the parable, the woman lights the candle and sweeps the house. There is a recognition that something is lost. We need to show the same care for those who have fallen away. Lost souls, lost dreams, lost hope. Helping people see that they still have value.

7. The candle represents the Word and God’s Spirit. Psalm 119:105 states, “Your word is a lamp for my feet, a light on my path.” My wife notices and is annoyed by even the smallest light in our bedroom at night. Even that tiny blue printer light changes the complexion of the room and is noticed. For lost things to become found things, we need to light some lamps, friends! Whether you’re a tiny blue printer light or a lighthouse beacon, be a light! Change the complexion of your environment. Illuminate the path to help lost people find God.

8. Just as the woman removes the dust, the church must work to keep its environment clean. Remove the filth—false doctrines, false teachers.

9. As with the found sheep, there is joy in heaven over the found coin. Every hour, every day, around the world, a lost sinner is found—heaven is a constant party! When someone repents, we should pray, rejoice, and then have a potluck!

10. Sometimes you’ll have the opportunity to help God search for the lost sheep/coin and bring them back. Other times, you’ll be the lost sheep/coin. How comforting to know that if you ever become lost—if you ever give up on faith—there will be a search party going on for your soul.

Next week, we’ll continue our study of the parables, once again focusing on something lost that is found. Homework: read Luke 15:11-32, The Parable of the Prodigal Son.